Owie

Hppi  Fwidy

Did I mention I chipped a tooth?  Got a call saying, “Come in on Friday, 8:00 AM, and we’ll get a crown for that.”  So today I went in to get a crown for my poor tooth.  Dentist says, “Huh, that broken one is the one we’re going to crown, not the chipped one.  We’ll have to do that one another time.”  ???  I’d forgotten about that one.  It’s the tooth in the very back on the top.  No, it’s not a wisdom tooth; those were removed a long time ago.  It’s half missing!  Needed to get that one crowned before it chipped or broke below the gum line.  Oh.  *sigh*

They did a temporary filling on the chipped one and ground the back one down (oh yes, that was fun) and my crown comes in about April 11.  I even got to pick the color!  I wanted purple, but I had a choice of dirty white or dirty yellow…  Definitely not WHITE as that would blind people, even though there shouldn’t be anyone looking that deeply into my mouth.  Step 1:  deaden mouth.  Step 2: ask interesting questions to this person in the chair with a mouth guard in and no feeling in jaw.  Step 3:  begin torture session on a person that will not feel the pain for 3-4 hours.  CIA wouldn’t be this cruel.  Picture this: “You’ll feel a little pinch.  Now put this in your back teeth even though it tends to dislocate your jaw, but you can’t feel it because your jaw is now numb.  OK, temporary filling in, let’s take out that mouth guard.  Let me look around in here… Good, good, now what instruments do you play?”  rwfeorkfir roteftjeifffff  “Very interesting!  Now we’re going to put this purple goop in your mouth.  Don’t swallow and keep your jaw clenched for 4-5 min.”  Now I start to drool uncontrollably and have this purple goop hardening on my lips and tongue.  Feels like a mouth full of melted gummy bears.  Jaw is starting to cramp, but I don’t know that, jaw is still numb.   He now pulls goop out of mouth.  “Ok, now to grind this tooth down and you will smell burning tooth and old filling. Good, good… now we’re going to put this string between your gum and your tooth to allow for the crown to sit below the gum line.”  wo iththa hobl tase? (translation: what is that horrible taste?!!!!) “Oh, that’s the drying agent.”  ith mayin me rul (It’s making me drool!–not conducive to drying I would think…)  “Remember that purple goop?  We’re going to put that in again, and there ya go, now clench for another 4-5 min.”  KGOR playing in the background.  I’m starting to feel the jaw joint.  It is not pleasant.  I’m also tasting this horrible horrible chemical… imagine burnt vinegar.  Eyes are watering.  Drooling uncontrollably, purple gummy bears hardening in my mouth, and now feeling a bit more in my jaw.  Pulls out the purple goop. It doesn’t all come out.  He take a pick to it, and it pops loose and I catch it with my tongue.  “Ok, I’ll be right back with the temporary crown.”  She loves you Ya, ya, ya…  She’s a Brick—House!!!!  “Here, put the mouth guard back in there, and just fit this thing in there. There now, let me take out the mouth guard, close, does that feel right?” rrr  “Ok, bite down on this and we’ll see if it needs adjusting.  That’s right, bite bite bite.. and grind left and right and front to back.  Good, good, now I’ll take out that crown and adjust some of the sharp edges and take it down a bit.”  zzzzz zzzzz zzzzzz     At least he’s not doing it in my mouth!  “Now lets try it out again.  Bite bite bite… grind grind grind.”  I think he studied at the Dr. Seuss school of Dentistry.  “How does it feel?” ow wd I no?  mth’s nm… (translation:  how would I know, mouth’s numb!)  “Good good… Let’s glue it in there.”  He pops the temporary crown out again and puts more really bad tasting stuff in my mouth, puts the crown in and puts a cotton roll into my mouth.  REAALLLYYY awful taste!  “There!  All done!  Now come back in about 2-3 weeks for the real one.  Don’t floss or eat anything like caramel or popcorn on that side.”  Whew!  Well that wasn’t so bad.

It is now time to go to gym and I did 20 (!!!!) min on the elliptical!  Lvl 4 and then 5 on resistance.  Go to have my 550 cal. breakfast.  Come home to do training on computer and NOW it starts to hurt.  It feels like I got hit on the left side of my face with a horse shoe…repeatedly!  OF COURSE I’LL TELL YOU WHO ELSE WAS IN ON THE CONSPIRACY!  AND THE MAP TO THE SITUATION ROOM IS IN MY SOCK DRAWER!  AND… I VOTED FOR OBAMA!  WHATEVER YOU WANT ME TO CONFESS TO, NOOOO PROBLEM!  I NEED SOME MEDS!