Better Shape up!

It’s 5:45 in the morning and the radio starts playing.  John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John singing their famous duet…”You’re the One that I want!”  hoo hoo hoo baby…

I pulled my back adjusting my sitting position in the couch last night.  Is that even possible?  Obviously it is.  My constant use of crutches, bad posture (due to crutches) and favoring one leg due to broken hip (and crutches) has slowed my progress.  I am sitting in a hard-backed chair, and it feels good!  How do I improve my standing posture if I can’t put weight on my left foot though?  I have to shift my center of gravity over my right foot and that curves the spine out of shape.  It tightens the muscles in my back as they adjust to the new posture, and they scream obscenities at me as some have to stretch to accommodate this temporary stance.

What am I thinking while this agony twists my brain?  A COMEDY!  Grease re-visited.  We catch up with Danny and Sandy at age 68.  They do all their dancing with walkers in the style of The Producers.    Change the words from “You’re the one that I want” to “You’re the one that I got…”  Summer Nights would become Summer Afternoon, once a month, whether we need it or not…  Rizzo would spend the whole movie coughing.  The fair scene where they sing “We go together like…” would be very funny.  They could list all the medications they’re taking.  “We go together like Levotal, Plendil, and Phenoxybenzamine…” Oh, and Travolta would be wearing an ill fitting toupee…

I confess, I have been doing PT for my hip even though my doctor is of the opinion that those evil PT guys will break my titanium appliance.  I’ve been told not to go to PT, though I might even though my doctor won’t clear me for it.  I may find a way anyway.  I think my recovery is being stunted.  My trips to the gym are not limited by my PT however, and I am including some upper body work as well…chest presses, dips, ab work, shoulder, triceps extensions.  The pain in my shoulders replaces the pain in my hip.  The main thing I’m trying to do, since my activity is severely curtailed is watch my food intake.  I watch it leave my plate into my mouth.  But since I’m a lousy shot, I still get a great deal of it on my shirt.  What lands on the shirt is not counted in the calories, so I’m eating less…I think…

With the level of hardware in my leg I was joking about not being able to go into the St. Louis Arch without setting 15 armed guards off demanding how I could carry an Uzi in my leg.  Ha ha ha.  Well, I went to the Barnes and Nobel and found myself setting off alarms on my way IN to the store.  Since I obviously wasn’t carrying a book, it was curious.  I dread the possibility of being strip-searched every time I go to a department store…

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