Tag Archives: nutrition?


via Daily Prompt: Branch


Breathe in

Breathe out.

Soak up sun!

Ahhhhh warmth

Ooooo cool rain




Branches fall

I fall



Root was small and weak



Old root

Life returning

Power from root!


We are one

Raw to root

Refined from root

Warmed and cooled

But now I grow strong


NOT anxious

Like a brush through hair

I’m growing

I’m extending.

New limbs

Powerful connection

Root sings to me

My birds sing back.

Strong root–

Strong branch.



I don’t believe it!

I have spent the better of 1 hour on my feet.  I now have to sit down and rest.  Then I’ll get up again and spend about 1/2 hour on my feet.  Then sit down.  Then I make cookies with the grandkids.  I now have to sleep for 2 hours and am sore for hours after that.  I love baking cookies!  I love cooking!  I love clean…whoops, not that one.  But when I finish, in fact multiple times within the cooking and baking, I have to sit.  When I’m done my feet are sore, my back is sore, and I’m exhausted!

My friend Gloria read from a book “Getting Old is Not for Sissies!”  I sure identified with that!  At this time, I have my kids so well trained, all I have to do is the “up” gesture they used when they were two years old, and they will pull me out of my chair.  Why do I need to be pulled out of my chair?!  This is ridiculous!  My old year’s resolution was to drop some pounds so I wouldn’t be in this painful condition.  I went on a diet, (ketogenic) and I must have done it wrong because I GAINED weight.  I spent time in the gym doing my physical therapy exercises so I wouldn’t limp so much.  I’m still limping.  I got on the curve treadmill and the stationary bike to build up my endurance.  I’m out of breath going up 7 stairs.   It seems counterintuitive that when you consume fewer calories, and exercise more to use more calories, that you can remain the same weight or gain.  That’s just how it is with me, so I’m not going to rant on that (again) but I sure would like to find something that works.  I feel so icky!


What if things go wrong.  You can count on things going wrong actually.  They’re very consistent.  You have a plan, you execute the plan, the plan goes off the rails, you throw the plan out.  Those are Captain Cold’s rules.  He then gets trapped in a room with a giant shark/man mutant from another dimension (Demention?  from crazy town?)  He does get rescued in time though.

I am on this weird journey to make Measurable progress in getting fit.  My 1st entry in this blog was March 6, 2014.  OMG.  I was 208 pounds then.  I’m 218 now.  Since that 1st entry, I have looked for the right combination of exercise and diet that would get me down to about 140 pounds which I haven’t weighed since my youngest was born…143 pounds plus or minus.  I remember that weight because I was 143 pounds going into the hospital as a pregnant lady, and came out weighing 143 pounds AFTER the child was born.  How is that possible?  He was 7# 4 oz.  I should have weighed at least 7 pounds less coming out!  That was the beginning of this strange journey into obesity.  Hahaha!  I can blame my boy!  Nope, that won’t work.

I cut myself down to 1200 calories a day.  I have been at 1200 calories a day for 3 years.  I have tried cutting out chocolate, then bread, then carbs in general, then colas, and at one time I existed on soup for a week.  Of course that was because I had a terrible respiratory virus that precluded me from eating solid food.  I couldn’t keep anything down but soup.  I do not recommend it.  I have exercised cardio and strength training 5 days a week with a trainer 3 days of those days, and I have exercised on my own taking occasional walks and going to the gym to work on the tread mill once a week.  I have been told I’m eating too little.  I have been told that to really lose the weight, I have to go on an 800 calorie diet and take supplements.  I have been told that all I need to do was portion control.  I have been told that all I need to do is start a running regimen.

In the course of this journey, I have had a 1/2″ kidney stone, I have broken my hip, and I have suffered all sorts of indignities that go with being too big.  I especially hate shopping for clothes.  “Here, try this tent on, the circus won’t be back until spring.”  I cannot physically get into a swimsuit because I cannot bend over to get both my feet in.  It doesn’t work like underwear.  I used to love swimming.  I used to love dancing.  I’m winded going up to the sidewalk of the gym.  I watch all the weight loss commercials and think to myself, well they wouldn’t work for me.  I think the laws of physics and biology bend around me.  I think I have ranted on this before…if you eat less and exercise more, you use more calories than you take in and you lose weight.  Unless you’re not eating enough, then they pile on.  If you are awake really late at night because you have something on your mind, and you’re moving, you’re using more calories, right?  But if you don’t get enough sleep, you gain weight.  So the laws of physics apply to every situation except when they don’t.

I HAVE NO VICES!  I do not overeat.  I do not smoke.  I do not drink.  I do not commit adultery.  I do not gamble.  I might be addicted to Longmire, but I don’t think that’s a vice since it has a definite ending point.  And yet…  I cannot find the energy to clean, or cook, or garden, or walk or dance or swim because I am so big and it takes so much effort.  I get depressed because I know I DO have 6-pack abs, but they’re so insulated that no one can see them.  I used to dance 5 hours a day.  I used to hike 10 miles.  I used to go on bike rides all over.  I used to march and play a horn for an hour a day.  I used to chase 5 kids around.  I used to be a pit pop who moved the percussion instruments on and off the field and in and out of the trucks.  I used to set field props for band contests.  I couldn’t do any of that now, even at gunpoint.

And now, I have another physical issue.  I don’t want to be in a state of always having to do something to fix something.  I don’t want to take medicine for the rest of my life.  I want it fixed.  When the light bulb goes out, you replace it.  You don’t have to monitor it every stinking day to see if there is something that MIGHT go wrong with it.  When you replace a broken window, you do it and it’s fixed.  There is no daily activity you have to do to make sure the fixed window hasn’t degraded into a broken window.  When you break a bone and they reset it, it heals and then EVERY FREAKING DAY you have to exercise the muscles around it so you can continue to use it for the rest of your life.  Because once it’s broken, it’s ruined.  Nothing will ever be right about it from that point on.  If you have a kidney stone, EVEN AFTER YOU’VE PASSED IT, you’re likely to have more.  The kidney is ruined and nothing will ever be right about it from that point on.  If you’ve gained weight, by whatever means it has happened, your metabolism is ruined and it will never be right again.  Every day, you start from 0.  It’s like Forrest Gump if he were in the Outer Limits. He starts his cross country run, runs for 25-30 miles.  He goes to sleep and wakes up the next morning in his bedroom.

As a good friend of mine says, “Oh Well.”


I wrote that last one Sept 1, and then something happened and it didn’t publish.

Ok, well, published now.

End of 1st week:  It’s hard not to drink coffee/tea/pop and stick to water.  I went a week on this water experiment and then had some Mountain dew with my salad.  I couldn’t finish it.  It was way too sweet!  I had coffee with my breakfast, and could only drink a 1/2 a cup.  My body’s reacting to this in ways I didn’t predict.  Should be interesting.

Lips still feel sticky, but less so.


Water you up to?  Not much, you?

Hahahaha!  I crack myself up.  (cues laugh track)

I was looking on my bottle of tea for ingredients.  It SHOULD say water and green tea.  It doesn’t.

Water, Citric acid, Hexametaphosphate, Natural flavor (why would you have to ADD natural flavor?  If it isn’t added, why is it listed as an ingredient?) Green tea (there’s the tea), ascorbic acid, potassium sorbate, phosporicacid, aspartame, acesulfame potassium, pectin, and calcium disodium EDTA. And what is EDTA?  Ethylenediaminetetraacetic acid. (That’s ethylene diamine tetra acetic acid)  It is made from a concoction of poisons and chelation chemicals:  formaldehyde, sodium cyanide, and Ethylenediamine.  Yummy!

Back to water.  It has been pointed out to me that I might be suffering from chronic dehydration.  Chronic?  It means I’m consistently drinking stuff other than water.  Think of it this way.  You’re making bread.  It calls for flour, sugar, milk, salt, butter and yeast.  That’s fairly straight forward isn’t it.  Milk is liquid.  Substitute 2/3 c of dry milk and 1 cup water.  Now…Here’s where the fun begins.  Try substituting 1 cup of tea for the water.  Now try 1 cup of coffee.  Oooo!  how about a cup of kalua!  Wait.  1 cup of Mountain Dew!  I like Mountain Dew, let’s make it 2 cups!  Yum!  In any case, you’re not going to get bread out of this recipe.

The body craves water.  Simplest form possible.  If it gets something other than water, it first has to clean it to get the water out.  That’s an extra step.  When you pollute the water with flavorings and extra chemicals to maintain its color and addict you to the secret ingredient (High Fructose Corn Syrup),  you don’t get as much water as you need out of the concoction.  Your nerves need water to make sure the electrical impulses are not short circuited.  Your brain needs water because it’s the brain and it knows what it wants.  Your bones need water to lubricate the joints.  Your blood needs water so it doesn’t get too thick.  OK, so no, I don’t exactly know why all these systems need water, but they do.  But I don’t drink nearly enough water.  I bet you don’t either.  You drink sports drinks, and pop, and milk, and tea, and beer, and wine and juice.  But you don’t just drink water.  Oh we make a big deal about carrying our water in little bottles with labels that say “this here water is pure as the driven snow and melted down from a glacier in Nova Scotia…or from the tap of Mrs. Livingston in Rockwell, Ill.”  We drink the water at the gym and where ever we think someone will see us being healthy.  Then we go home and have a 2 liter Mountain dew with our pizza.  Or we have 1/2 a case of beer with our steak and potatoes.

I want to try an experiment.  Let’s get as many people to do a WATER ONLY September.

  1. Take your measurements and describe your well-being before you start, and then at the end of the month.  Let me know what you discover.
  2. If you drink anything, it has to be water.  No tea, coffee, fruit drinks, diet drinks, pop…just water.  I think the standard amount is related to your weight.  I may be way off base, but figure 1 oz of water for every 2 pounds you weigh.  So if you are 100 pounds, you drink 50 oz of water a day.
  3. You can have soup and broth, but it doesn’t substitute for water, it would be in addition to water.

I will collate the information and let you know the results in October.  It could have revealing results.



I am so disillusioned!  I thought Sinko de Mayo was when you ate mayonnaise by the sink!  Now I find out it’s a DATE?  5th of May…who knew

Apparently nobody.  Cinco De Mayo has nothing to do with Mexican Independence, that was September 16, 1810.  It is a celebration of an underdog victory–the Mexicans beat the French on May 5.  It is usually celebrated by military parades in Mexico.  In the US though, it is a holiday where all the gringos switch to tequila to get drunk.

St. Patrick’s day is a solemn occasion that reveres St. Patrick who was instrumental in converting Ireland to Catholicism. But in the USA, everyone wears green and they dye the water in the Chicago river green as well.  There’s parades and pub crawls, and it has nothing to do with the celebration of St. Patrick’s day.

New Year’s Day is when we make our resolutions and reflect on the past year.  Unless you’re from the US, then you start drinking Dec 30 and get so blasted that they pass out and miss the momentous occasion at midnight on the 31st.

What is it about Americans that we use every excuse to get a day off work and get drunk or high to excess?  How is that fun?  Why do people look for occasions to escape their lives–either by running away from work or spouse or kids or becoming unconscious?  Being drunk isn’t fun.  You can’t see, you can’t talk right, you can’t walk straight, you throw up, you pass out, you lose your inhibitions and do really stupid things that you regret for a long time after.  Why do they have to make low-calorie beer?  Is it to entice you to drink more since you won’t then gain weight?  What is the matter with people?!

It has a lot to do with how people see themselves.  It is not with a small amount of discomfort that I refer to myself as fat and give my fat “sentience” and a name (Obie) and a personality.  If people see themselves as trapped in a job, or in a relationship, or by circumstance with a family, they will engage in escape behavior.  I’ve been good all week!  I deserve to have that cake, since nothing I do will ever make me thin…  Counter intuitive don’t you think?  I will engage in a drinking binge where I end up in a motel with someone I don’t know and have no recollection of the whole night.  That should fix my broken marriage.  What kind of idiot thinks like that?  Quit crying or I’ll give you something to cry about.  Wouldn’t the end result be continued crying at a louder volume and a longer period of time?  Nobody is addressing the root cause of the issue.    We shouldn’t have to feel a need to escape.  We’re not in a hopeless situation.  We’re not fleeing to Canada or Mexico.  (BTW, Are the anti trump celebrities still here?)  We have 46 million people in the US that are foreign born.  People want to come here.  All those other societies with free health care, and better schools and better understanding of immigrants etc, only have a fraction of the number of people going to the US.  How long will the myth of the American dream last?  Longer than you might think.

They all think we’re rich.  We consider ourselves living paycheck to paycheck and just barely scraping by…with a new car, a 52″ screen TV, food of every imaginable type available EVERYWHERE and for EVERYONE.  No lines for staples like bread and milk that run out.

Our WORST problem is that we’re all fat.  Poor Americans, they have too much food.  But we’re the ones trying to escape our lives?  Good morning America…count your blessings.

It’s raining

It’s Pouring, the Old Man is Snoring…

Ok I’m snoring.  I’m lying on my side in the Physical Therapist’s office on a padded table with a heating pad on my leg.  It’s really heavy and it’s moist heat.  *beep*  Time for the ultra sound.  zzzzzzz.  *beep*  “Were you sleeping?”  Me?  No.  Why do you ask?  “Because normally people who are awake don’t snore.”  oh

She really really worked my IT band–the tendon that connects the hip and the knee.  Iliotibial band it’s called.  I’m cross-eyed in pain…and also I don’t have my glasses on so I may not be cross-eyed, just blurry.  ANYWAY, after the torture comes the exercises.  Leg lift with 2 lb. weights, side lift with same weight (OWIE!  that one’s hard.)  Hamstring stretch 3 x at 30 seconds.  Leg extensions with 3 lb weight.  Leg curl with blue band resistance.  Calf stretch 3 x at 30 seconds.  Hip glider machine, 3 springs, 15 times.  Sideways stepping, marching then on to the box.  It’s 4″ box I step up on my bad leg, touch my right toe and then step back down.  15 of those.  After that, I step up on my bad leg and then continue forward and step down on my good leg.  15 of those.  5 min on the tread mill, lvl 1.

Then I walk out of the office.  I don’t limp for a good 45 min after that.  Then I sit down and of course it tightens up again, but I’m not limping as bad.  But it’s raining.  I have to limp fast to get to the car!  So I am making measurable progress.

I do have a question though.  You all know how hard it is for me to loose weight.  Very strict diet, and I do as much exercise as I can given my current physical state.  Do the probiotics work?  Could I have a digestive problem instead of a calorie problem?


Cursing comes from the scales in the bathroom.  Wall banging.  Stomping.  “All I did was eat 1 potato!  One little potato smaller than my fist!  Baked!  Salted!”  Those sneaky bastids.  275 calories, 63 g of carbs!!!!!  My limit for carbs is 90/day. So if I have an apple at 116 calories, I have 30 more g of carbs and I’m maxed out.  I can have 1200 cal per day so I still have 800 more calories, but I can’t eat any more carbs.  So no carrots or celery or melon, or grapes or broccoli.  Just meat.  800 calories of just meat.  YOU CAN’T WALK OFF CARBOHYDRATES.  I could have 2 slices of bread and it would be less than 1 potato.  GAAAAAAAHHHHH!  I could go for the rest of the day without eating, and zip off to the gym and do cardio for 2 hours and weight lifting for an hour but because I had 1 potato, I will gain weight.  1 cup of rice would be 2/3 the carbs of 1 potato.  Pasta has fewer carbs than a potato.

Starvation subsistence foods in very poor countries consist of things that are high carb–rice, bread, potatoes, corn–all very starchy. The protein was hard to get because usually it was bigger than you and had teeth and claws and horns and ran faster than you.  Most of these staples were grain based–wheat, barley, corn, rice, because they were easy to plant and harvest and you harvested in multiples of what you planted.  AND, it had no teeth, claws or horns and couldn’t run away.  Imagine if you planted 100 grains of wheat and only harvested 100 grains.  Wheat knows that not all its “children” are going to live to maturity, and allows for unsuitable soil, birds and other predators, bad weather, drought, so it multiplies itself when it matures by as many times as it can to ensure that the wheat family will continue.  (Wheat doesn’t know anything doofus!  Wheat has no brain!  I’m sorry, I had a potato, I’m not thinking straight!)

We now have supermarkets where we can catch trout, buffalo, pigs, cows, chickens, turkeys, the odd yak…  No hunting required!  No making spears and lying in wait in the tall grass!  Woohoo!  I can go shoe shopping!  Instead of taking hours to gather enough grains to pound into powder and make into something we can eat, we get bags of flour.  Instead of checking to see if the food is ripe before we can eat it, we have it shipped in from Florida and Texas and California.  Finding and preparing food is easy!  And even so, we want to have someone else make it.  DING!  Restaurants!  and Fast Food!  and Pot Luck dinners in the basement of the church!  We don’t need the starvation subsistence foods because we’re not starving.  BUT we crave them because deep deep (really deep) in the back of our minds, there is something asking, “What if we run out of food tonight?”  That’s why there are a million recipes for potatoes, pasta, rice and bread.  Every meal includes carb laden items.  All the far eastern dishes include some form of rice or noodles.  We think meat and ___________, that’s right potatoes.  The natives of the land were largely animal fed.  1 large animal could feed a community for days.  To stretch out the time the food would last, it was combined with whatever could be gathered and processed.  The plants gathered could be stored with minimum spoilage and used in between hunting expeditions.  But when they started planting food, they had to stay put to harvest it and couldn’t follow the food source around.  When the harvest was done, you had to wait another year for the next harvest so it had to be planned out.  How much do I need for a year of food?!  If only we could keep meat animals here on the acreage and they didn’t eat all our subsistence plants!  Oooh, ducks, geese, chickens, sheep, goats, fish!  DANG that cow eats a lot!

So in order to eat a balanced diet, get the exercise we need, we need to revert to temporary housing and follow herds around.  I love camping, but I’m not ready to live in a tent and move every 3-4 days.  Where would I plug in my computer?

Note to self:  NO POTATOES before writing blog!


I hate changing schedules!  I was supposed to meet with my trainer on Friday morning, and I had to reschedule because I had another meeting that unfortunately trumps training.  I went Saturday instead.  Now I’m starting to get confused.  She really made me work!  I did chin-up and dips, and she increased the weight by 10 pounds.  Then, in between sets, she had me do calf raises, which in ballet would be eleves, but done as fast as possible.  Then we proceeded to a core series:  assisted crunch machine–30 crunches with a 30 second hold at the end, then to the crunch machine and had that set at 80 pounds for a set of 15, then to the sitting ab crunch machine with feet extended 15 at 65 pounds, then over to the incline bench and do a sit up to standing position with a twist  from side to side and a 10 pound plate for 15.  Went through the series 3 times.  Our concert that night was cancelled due to bad weather.  But it feels like Friday.  Sunday comes and I go to church then cook a bit, then we head down to our next concert which is roughly in the same area as where we practice.  Leave at 5, get home at 11.  But we practice on Mondays, so now when I wake up on Monday, it’s TUESDAY.  All the things I’m supposed to do on Tuesday I’ve done on Monday without the bonuses.  Then we head down for practice, and it’s Monday again.  Smoke is appearing out my ears.  Standing on cement in flip flops, in a twisted position playing 2 instruments at once, and all that ab work is taking its toll, and now my calves are cramping because of the shoes.  I’m stiff when I get into the car and drive home.  Left at 6, getting back about 10:20.  15 miles from home, hit a deer.  DAM!  Damage to the headlight on driver’s side, Left front panel, destroyed driver’s side mirror.  I have no idea what day it is now.  Go and get something for supper (missed due to rehearsal) and I think it’s Free Pie Wednesday.  Lord knows I don’t need pie.  So I get some.

Then I limp out of the restaurant WIDE AWAKE, and go home.  I have a training session this morning, at 9 or 8 or is that Yesterday or maybe tomorrow, then I have more stuff to do… all the Tuesday stuff I did on Monday has to be redone today.  Argh…thus the title:  Owie

and then the cherries came in

Sunday is my day away from the gym.  I got home from church and fell asleep on the couch for a about 30 min, and 3 1/2 hrs later, my hubby woke me up so we could go play in a concert.  Oh my.  Saw my kitchen friend in the drum section and she’s going to help me put up cherries after the concert.  It was hot, and I had to carry my instrument and some of the stuff that always goes with concerts… stand, water bottle, your hubby’s horn, and he carries the stands the mutes and the music (thank goodness!) There must be about 30 pounds of junk in that stand/mute bag!  As we played, these deep dark roiling clouds came in.  It made it at least not as bright, but the humidity is nasty.  I keep sliding off my mouthpiece.  We got back home about 6:00 and started pitting and steaming and processing cherries.  We barely made a dent.  Cherry jelly, candied cherries, canned cherries, and cherry mash to make jam out of. 2 1/2 hrs!  Then there’s the mess to clean up.

When I make my cherry stuff,  I know exactly what is going into it.  It takes 4 cups of sugar for every 3 1/2 cups of juice.  You get about 5 cups of jelly from it.  I can my cherries in juice instead of sugar, so the only sweetness is the cherry taste.  The candied cherries are going into some almond ice cream that I’m going to make later.

I did my aerobic work out yesterday…15 min on treadmill set on mystery hike.  20 min on elliptical with lvl 4 crossramp and lvl 5 resistance, up from the 4 and 4 I was doing last week.  10 min on the stationary bike on lvl 5.

Then we went to the movie, “Chef.”  You HAVE to see this movie!  It is fantastic.  Nothing blows up, nothing invades from outer space, no crime, no violence (except when he attacks the lava cake), has Jon Favereau, John Leguizamo, Oliver Platt, Scarlett Johanson, Dustin Hoffman, and Sofia Veraga.  The language is a bit rough, but if you’ve ever worked in a kitchen, it’s mild.  Buddy with a reconnect with kid flick.  I would Definitely see it again and may buy it when it comes out on DVD.  And it was about food, which I think about a lot… but only healthy food.  Ok I lied.  Fattening, flavorful, delicious, gotta-have-some-more food is what I think about…  then I pass a mirror.  I realize I can never eat for pleasure again.